Giving thanks

Each year at Christmas, our thoughts turn to the people who'll be spending their holiday season in neonatal intensive care units around the world- the babies, the parents, and the staff who are taking care of them.

Sophie escaped from hospital on December 17th in 2008, 26 days after she was born, and for a while there it looked like we'd end up spending Christmas in hospital ourselves. I can't even tell you how relieved we were to avoid that, but not everyone gets so lucky. Sophie's little friend Matty spent that same Christmas in the same NICU as part of his total 202 days in hospital after being born at 25 weeks and 5 days (see here for our post about Matty and his family for Prematurity Awareness Month last year).

We decided last year that we wanted to do something for all the staff who give up precious time with their own families to take such good care of the babies in the NICU, and their families, too. So, we created a tradition we'll keep up for as long as we live in Perth- making a platter of baked goodies to take in on Christmas Eve so the staff have something to enjoy.

This year, I had a crazy crack at running a cake and cookie sort-of-sort-of-not business from home. In the end, I just didn't have the time to fit in that plus three days of work in my regular job, plus completing my novel, plus being Sophie's mum, so I gave it up. But I still love a good cookie challenge, and when I found The Mad Baker's Christmas ornament cookies earlier in the year, I knew I had to have a shot at them for my Princess Margaret Christmas Eve platter.

So, I made my own cookie cutters in the shape of a few different Christmas ornaments, went with a theme of purple and gold, and baked up a nice big batch of brown sugar cookies.



I think they turned out pretty well, and I hope the staff enjoyed them (and the homemade rocky road that also went on the platter).


Matty's mum Pam used to bake an awesome cake each time Matty reached another kilo in weight during his NICU time, and as a result of that inspiration, she started a cake business of her own. If you're in Perth and looking for a special occasion cake, I can personally recommend Cake O'Clock. Her cakes are amazing and completely delicious, and the lucky staff at Princess Margaret got a whole batch of those in addition to their cookies.

Taking the goodies into Princess Margaret was quite a moment for both Pam and I, and I was very glad to have her there with me. Last year, I dropped my platter at the front desk. This year, we were actually allowed into the NICU itself. I hadn't been in there since I walked out the door two years ago, Sophie being carried by the lovely nurse, Ron, who accompanied us back to Albany on the plane.

Very emotional to be back there at all, let alone to hear sounds that in 19 days became so familiar that I'll never forget them- the beeps of the monitors, the dinging alarms, the babies crying. Not to mention the disinfectant hospital smells that are always so evocative, and the sight of the various beds and rooms that Sophie moved through during her stay- first the main floor, with the sickest of the sick babies; then into a four-bed room when things were looking up, and she was first taking milk through a naso-gastric feeding tube; then finally the big nursery, where she stayed for ten days while we waited (and waited... and waited...) for her oxygen dependency to cease and her weight to go up.

It doesn't matter how much time passes; it doesn't matter how well your little one is doing- being back in the NICU takes you back and puts you right there again. I think it always will.

As Pam said yesterday, though, the strongest emotional urge walking through that door was to go straight to all the parents we saw sitting there beside their babies on Christmas Eve, and tell them that time eventually does begin to move again. One day, soon for some, not so soon for others, you do get to walk out those doors. Sure, at that stage the future might not be certain- but with each passing day the fog will clear a little, and one day you'll know what odds you and your little one are really fighting against. You'll be on the other side, moving forward.

Let me illustrate.


Two years on from that time in the NICU, Sophie had an awesome Christmas today- she had all four of her grandparents in the same house at the same time, which is quite unprecedented, since her Grandpa lives overseas. She laughed, chatted, cuddled, stuffed herself with ham lunch and sweets, and crashed for a three-hour nap in the middle of the festivities. She was the master of ceremonies, the opener of everyone's presents, and the stand-up comedy act to entertain everyone.

At 2 years and one month of age, she can now sing the whole alphabet, including the entire "now I know my ABCs" at the end. She talks in full sentences, stringing together six and seven words at a time, and can explain almost anything she needs with words. She caught a ball for the first time last week, and is now a dab hand at that. She can write one letter of the alphabet (that's "O"), and has a good shot at a second ("S" for Sophie). And her days are spent conjuring all kinds of adventures for her favourite teddy bears (and her mother)- her imagination knows no bounds, as illustrated by a recent visit to my office, where she promptly picked up the phone and proceeded to have a conversation with my mother and her dog ("Hello Gramma! Ooh, Gramma's making yummies! Stop barking, Bella!").

I mention these milestones in particular because they're in the list of what's expected at three years of age and above. She's going from strength to strength, getting further and further ahead in all developmental areas all the time. She's been discharged from paediatric follow-up this week, and we're now waiting only on our physiotherapy and occupational therapy discharges in March to be specialist-free.

So, Christmas is our time to be especially thankful for the hardworking people who made it possible for Sophie to be the little star she is today, and to appreciate the incredible luck that brought us to this point.

And with that, we wish you all a very happy holiday season, and look forward to what 2011 has in store.

Girls dressed up for the party.


Sophie discovers an Elmo present (the best kind, apparently).


Digging into a roll with lunch, not looking terribly impressed (don't worry, everyone else was).



Taking a break from all the pandemonium to read herself a book, very quietly and all on her own.



Doctor Sophie- who knows? One day she just might be. The world is her oyster.